07 May 2010

...get that spider!

What is family history and genealogy? Just a bunch of boring names, dates and places? Or does it include the everyday experiences of life? This one ought to brighten your day!

I decided I wanted to preserve a Facebook conversation I had with some family and friends and I decided that this was a great example of the fun things in life that make people “real”. So enjoy this hysterically funny gem! At least I think it is!

JENNIE - has a spider trapped under a plastic container. Now I don't know what to do...

KAREN - Is it one of those BIG things?? If it is small be brave and step on it!

JENNIE - It's one of the big ones. There is no way I can step on it!

MINDY - Wow and I thought I was a wimp.....this reminds me of the night my mom and dad got to your house one time and you had a praying mantis under a plastic bowl that Gracey had brought in the house and you were freaked out and were waiting for Todd to come home to take it out! If I remember right, dad got it for you and chased you with it first before putting it back outside! Jen if this spider is smaller than a hobo.....I am so making fun of you! hehehe

SADIE - I just shivered after reading that!! Ewww! I hate spiders so bad!

KAREN - lol ..Mindy I was there that day too and remember that! Pick up the bowl and have a large book ready to throw on top of it! SMASH...Just don't miss!!

SUSIE -Slide a piece of paper under the cup and take it outside. While on the way outside make a pack with Mr. Spider that he stay outside where he belongs and you will not step on him and squish him! :) Works for me!

SUE - Jennie, I'm with you!!! If you step on it it's spirit will get ya! haha If Todd didn't come home, I'd be for finding someone else!

JENNIE - Haha, thanks a lot Mindy! It is HUGE! Susie, that would be waaaaay too brave to do it that way. Here's how it went down. . . I asked him how he got in the house. . .he didn't answer. . . I asked him if there were others. . .still no answer. So, I had no choice. I got all Jack Bauerish on him, lifted the container and sprayed spider spray in there.... It was supposed to kill on contact but it didn't! That's how big he is!! I couldn't stand to watch him suffer, even though he is a spider, so I basically kept spraying until he drowned! Now I'm afraid of its spirit, thanks Sue :) And I'm sure you have all figured out that Todd is out of town or I would have just waited until he got home from work like usual :)

TAMMY - Jennie, use the vacuum!

SUE - Not the vacuum! Then his spirit will float around the room !!!! And, you'll always be expecting him to crawl out -- just a little dazed!

HEATHER - Mom, You needed to do your scorpion technique by duck taping a phonebook to your swiffer sweeper and then kick the bowl away and run at it and scream as you crush it so you won't hear it crunch. I have seen you do it before with a scorpion. You could do it with the spider :)

SUE - Heather, I want to see that on video! :D

JENNIE - I actually thought about doing that Heather but this was a seriously big spider. Even Matthew was amazed by how big it was and it had two big long legs out the front. I'm always afraid to use the vacuum because in my mind every spider is pregnant and then she will have her babies in my vacuum and then, basically I would have to get rid of the vacuum :)

HEATHER - Oh man it was great. The scorpion was on the wall and my mom took a running start with her swiffer sweeper duck taped to a phone book and started screaming before she hit it so she would not here the crunch of it. I was so proud of her. She immediately called my dad to tell him how brave she was. HE HE Oh the memories :)

MELISSA - That sounds familiar. You need a can of Raid on hand, you spray the spider and then put the cup over it...just in case it doesn't die. Then you wait for your husband to get rid of it. Why do those little creepy things have to be so nasty? I hate spiders!

SUSIE - Phahahahaahahahaha..... ohh that so got a belly laugh out of me. I had a black widow in my laundry room, we talked for quite awhile. She would NOT agree to stay put or just leave my laundry room quietly.... So I hair sprayed her to death. Yep I think she drowned and became stiff. Hahahaha! I don’t think I've ever admitted to that until now.

SUE - Hair spray works great on flying insects too! They get sticky and can't move their wings! haha Beats the tar out of chasing that flying monster throughout the house and looking like one of those 10 leaping lords!

MICHELLE - I am dying laughing at this whole conversation! I can just picture you with the duct tape swiffer trying to smash the scorpion!! Hahaha!! Miss you so much!!

PS: I love my family!